At least with Lauren and Sheila, they played the same characters. I used to watch B&B way back, when the whole Sheila/Lauren thing was big on the show and I can't for the life of me remember why they hated each other. Probably something to do with men.

There was also a "business" cross over with Jack from Y&R visiting Forrester Creations on B&B and then later on Brooke went over to Y&R, because part of that storyline was Brooke wanting to make a Forrester perfume.

Then Kristen on DOOL left and popped up as Ashley on Y&R. That was weird.

Stefano will also never be Massimo. I don't care what show he's on - HE IS STEFANO!

I agree with watching some really well-known actors in long-time roles go to other soaps.

I understand why he left OLTL but everytime I catch ATWT, it's like, "what the hell is todd doing in Oakdale?" And watching RH act remotely happy is just too weird after 11 years of watching him as tortoued, despondent todd on OL.

The time my mom watched and I saw him and dixie on the show it's like.."todd and dixie are talking to eatch-other..WTF?".

But that's not the worst, imo. Kelly Monaco played Livvie the vampire on Port Charles (the General Hospital spin-off soap) but now she's on General Hospital playing Sam McCall. It's very annoying to know that those two soap operas were supposed to take place in the same damn town but Kelly Monaco plays two very different characters (vampire vs mobster girlfriend) and it's not even acknowledged.

I watched AMC for about 10 years, but it's been awhile since I bothered to keep track of what's what in Pine Valley. Who the hell is Zarf? Simone died? I gather Dixie's back from the dead, of course, and Bianca's back from the wherever (yay!), so would anyone care to catch me up on the other stuff?

Well, the actress played Ashley before she was Kristen* so I'll let that slide. Stefano will always be Stefano though.

*Whenever I read or type "Kristen", I hear Susan's "Krist-ANNE" in my head.

It's because Sheila is NUCKING FUTS. She's pissed that Lauren has everything she wants, and I think it started with Danny, but then Sheila got pissed when Lauren got pregnant and stole her (Lauren's) child. And it looks like they're going in a similar direction this time. And Sheila was all, "Lauren has everything handed to her and she doesn't deserve it blah blah blah I am a crazy bitch." CRAZY.

But at least with CBS's crossovers, it makes sense because Y&R and B&B shared the same headwriter for a long time and they share the same soap creators.

ABC, though, has had a huge amount of head writers write their shows for so long that every three years or so, the show takes another turn and it's muddled the history between the shows so much that it doesn't really work too well when they do crossover. Plus, when they crossedover AMC and OLTL for the baby switch, it made no sense to me, because I don't watch OLTL and Dallas runs AMC one day behind, so it didn't work out logistically when I did try to watch OLTL. That's why I love NBC Daytime, because they don't even try to crossover their shows (especially now that they got rid of JER on Days). In fact, they both acknowledge that the other show takes place in the same universe and also contradict that by talking about the other show as another soap. It's all very funny.

I'll give it a shot. I don't know how much of a recap you're looking for, so I'll probably confuse you more than help you. Apologies in advance.

Bianca came back from Paris in October because she found out Maggie was cheating on her. They're on a break, I guess. Zarf is supposed to be some famous rock star, and Fusion is using one of his songs in an ad campaign. He was a hippie pain in the ass when he first showed up (and still is, IMO), but he lurves Bianca. He feels a cosmic connection, she's his soul mate, yadda yadda, but ZOMG, Binks is gay. Despite said gayness, she feels a connection, too. It's gradually being revealed that Zarf's true identity is a woman named Zoe, thus Bianca's attraction to him/her. We had the "big reveal" last week, and I'm sure wacky transgender hijinks will ensue this week.

Meanwhile, a serial killer is offing the women of Fusion. He got Simone (boo!) and Erin (meh) and has yet to get Babe, tragically. Zarf is kind of a red herring suspect, I think. The fact that the killer is leaving behind white ribbon and gardenias is supposed to link the killings with Zach's past, but they haven't gone into too much detail there, yet.

Dixie is back from the dead. She thought the car accident she was in four years ago would kill her, and she thought Tad would blame the baby for her death and therefore not love her, so she gave the baby up for adoption. When she ended up surviving, she decided she wanted the baby (Kate) back, but the doctor (Greg Madden) who arranged the adoption wouldn't go for that. She spent four years "searching" for Madden and leads to Kate's whereabouts. That eventually led her back to Pine Valley, where she lurked around town FOREVER. It all lead to a horrible summer story where Tad buried Madden alive to get information out of him and ended up accidentally killing him. Zach and Dixie stood trial for the crime and were acquitted. My issues with Tad for the moment don't stem from the fact that he killed a man (McTavish pulled that out of her ass at the last minute. She basically admitted that in an interview), but rather from the fact that he somehow finds a way to be self-righteous about it. Tad and I are on a break right now, too. Just like Bianca and Maggie. The soon-to-be orphaned little girl living with Julia and Jamie at Wildwind is supposed to be Kate. I'm really looking forward to that custody battle. Not.

There is a forced triangle between Jackson, Erica, and Jeff. I ignore this storyline because it sucks. Jeff is an ass, Erica is a child, and Jack is too good for all of them.

And then we have the triangle that ate All My Children, Babe/JR/Josh. Babe loves JR. But she loves Josh, too. But she wants to make her marriage work and keep her family together. But Josh is just sooooo sweeeet to her. Basically, JR tried to kill Babe back in May (and was unsuccessful, damn him) and accidentally got a pregnant Kendall instead. Babe, like the dumbass she is, forgave him and lied to keep him out of jail. They were basically in a good place, marriage-wise, for a while there. Then Colby was lost at sea, and JR was understandably preoccupied with finding his little sister. Babe didn't feel "needed," so she decided that doing Josh, her relentless stalker, on the Fusion roof would be a good idea. Josh continues to stalk Babe, Babe continues to encourage him, they all continue to suck. Also, Josh is a Kane in that he is Erica Kane's aborted fetus from back in the 70s.

And that's about it, I think. Oh yeah, Brooke is gone now, but you wouldn't know it from actually watching the show. The actress was basically fired, and her last scenes were supposed to be during Simone and Erin's funeral. Boo, show. There's also a thing about Kendall keeping a paternity secret from Ryan. The adorable Emma, the Kate red herring for the fall, is actually Ryan's daughter via one of his sperm donations from back in the day. Yeah, I know. What are the odds? Kendall is jealous on behalf of Spike (she's still nursing those parental abandonment issues, I guess), so she's keeping this information a secret. I hate this story because I love Kendall dearly. I long for the day when she is out of Ryan's sphere forever. Ryan sucks, yo. Poor Kendall has had to prop and carry his useless ass through way too many storylines.

Soap crossovers and actors playing different characters really don't bother me. I just accept it as part of the genre, like SORASing, wonky timelines, and teeny dresses as winter attire. If I think about these things too hard, they totally kill my enjoyment of the shows. Soap geography, however, drives me batty. On GH, I vaguely remember Alcazar kidnapping Carly and holding her captive on the coast of Bolivia. Does anyone else remember this?

Here, here on the geography mess on soaps.

I love on OLTL, in the beginning of a SL they have the next town WAY far away so said person can't come back in time, catch someone sleeping with someone else, what have you. Then after a couple months it's like going to the grocery store, the characters bop in and out of the town so fast.

Right now in Llanview I think Atlantic City went from being a hour or so drive, to about 10 minutes. And years back when they had the trainwreck fake killing nora, the town of Cherryvale was a good shot away from llanview..eventually half of llanview was parading around that town in a matter of minutes, while it took 3 hours for two characters back in town to have a five minute exchange.

And it also seems this "secret" houses that for years and years are hidden away for whatever plot device, after they are found are like apparently so easy to find, they have neighbors.

I loved when they had "lion's hart" which was supposedly a "secret" mansion victor lord had for years and years which like no one could find. Eventually the house went on the market as just a quaint little country home..Love it!

Cue Zarf dressed in a pink dress with ribbons in his hair.

Bookie takes bets on identity of soap opera murderer and doesn't notice the producers haven't exactly been making a secret of it

I think there may not be a custody battle. Here's my prediction: Poor Linda will give Kathy to Julia as she lays dying, because she and her husband don't have any other relatives or friends, or neighbors, or anyone at all in the universe who can care for the poor kid. They apparently live in some kind of biodome from what I can tell and Julia and Noah are the only people they've ever met. Anyway, somehow it will come to light that Kathy is really Kate (I'm betting on a convenient Linda/Julia conversation regarding Greg Madden). Once poor Linda has rejoined her husband in the great beyond, Julia will hand Kathy/Kate over to Tad and Dixie because it is The Right Thing To Do and Julia Keefer is a Good Person.

And then the wretched storyline can end, for the love of all that's holy.

That never gets less ridiculous, no matter how many times I read or hear it.


One more thing I'll add to your excellent recap, since it's bound to cause even more annoying drama: Krystal Chandler is carrying Tad's baby girl, and of course Adam has no idea the kid isn't his. There's nothing I love more than a "Who's Your Daddy?" storyline. They are always so fresh and creative. Pardon me while I go gag on something.

And a freaking Priest is covering for Krystal. Cause Jesus is down with the hobillies.

Seconding this. As farfetched, misguided and downright terrible (and boring!) most of the storylines have been on AMC in the last few years, this one has to be one of the worst.

Thanks for the recap, Gillian.

This is random, but can someone refresh my memory: what ever happened to Brooke? She's off the show, right?

Yeah, Brooke is off the show. The actress was let go, and instead of giving her a proper farewell or mentioning that she's leaving town or something, she just isn't there anymore. She was at the memorial for Simone and Erin, and now we just won't see her anymore. I assume we're to believe that she's still around town someplace, but just never on screen.

Same with Jackson's adopted son Reggie. He disappeared ages ago, and no one ever mentions him. You'd think at least Lily would notice that he's missing. She seems to keep good track of everything.