It's a birthday.
What are you supposed to give a two year old on their birthday?
whole wheat muffins and a stern discussion on mutual funds vs. bonds?

Actually, it's better to have a diverse portfolio so as to minimize risk. (Seeing as she's only two, she can stand to take a large amount of risk!) I would counsel the cute little munchkin to look into a variety of financial interests, including mutual funds, bonds, and stocks. Just because she doesn't understand the precepts of a free market economy isn't an excuse not to put her piggy bank money to good use!

You bitches really make me laugh sometimes.

That kid REALLY looks like her mother.

She'd better not have had any Coke at that party, because then all bets are off.

Nothing but organic blocks and wheat-free dairy free muffins.
And then a round of contra dancing.

Yay contra dancing! The dizziest dance ever!

Maybe it was a rum cake.

I thought two-year-olds couldn't eat cherries like that, with the stems still on them. Am I wrong?

Perhaps they were just for decoration, and her mother took them off before feeding it to her. Even adults should not eat cherry stems.

Unless you're attempting to tie a knot in one as a drunken party trick. Then there's no way you're not going to swallow a few.

Well, yeah, they won't hurt you, but they aren't really designed for good eatin'.

They probably shouldn't eat them, but even two year olds are usually smart enough to chew on them for a second and then spit them out (usually on your clothing, might I add) when they realize they're chewing on something hard and kinda yucky.

I don't think Bluebell is a silly name. Madonna? Maybe, but it worked for the other one.

I guess I'm the only one, but I don't find those pictures cute at all. The one of the two of them lying on the floor with the birthday cake and the Marie Antoinette vibes strikes me as rather sad and pathetic. What people wouldn't do to their kid for publicity.

If the worst thing she's doing to her kid for publicity is feeding her yummy, yummy cake, I think the kid'll be okay.

Bluebell is very cute, and I love her name. At least she won't be one of the many Emmas, Avas, Madisons, Graces, or Emilys-she'll stand out. As someone who grew up with a common name, I can tell you firsthand how much it sucks to be known in your class as Firstname A.