Be Safe NOW!This is hilarious. things that make you go, hwah?
Rip van Zelle999
isiscloud, that was wonderful! I laughed all the way through. I'm not actually sure I could pick a favorite, I loved all of them, but if I had to pick 2 to encourage others to click on that link, I'd go with:
| QUOTE |
| A quick family snapshot in front of the la-*test*-('") scene of a terrorist attack may became a treasured family keepsake that will preserve precious memories for years to come. |
and
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| Michael Jackson is a terrorist. If you spot this smooth criminal with scary eyes, run away now. |
!
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Wilhelmina: At age 59 a truly fanatic fan of your spoken word works will stalk you and torture you for a period of weeks. After refusing to sign any more autographs, the fan will kill you.
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But I....I...don't want to do spoken word performances! (Oh, and Kathy Bates - please stay faaaar away. Thanks.)
Using my real name.
| QUOTE |
| At age 39 you will be struck by lightning while trying to move the antenna beside your mobile home in order to pick up late night adult movies. |
Well atleast I'm in good company with this one.
| QUOTE |
| Spork_The_Cat: At age 31 your head will explode after being exposed to Britney Spears for thirty-six consecutive hours! |
Spork, I hope you're dead before the 36 hours arrives...that's just plain torture.
Also, see you on the other side!
Since it's the Year of the Pig, celebrate the
35 grea-*test*-('") porkers in popular cultureYes, your parents once dressed
like this (if they were really cool)
Um, yeah, my parents. Not me. Nope.
Hell, I once dressed like that!
OMG, they have
pictures of
my mother!
(Well, not really. But those women bear an uncanny resemblence to what I've seen in her high school yearbooks.)
I may have worn a stylish brown crimplene trouser suit with belt or I may not. All I know is I looked
sharp for a 12 year old. Nearly as sharp as
these kids, back in the days when polyesters roamed the streets.
On 2.0, someone posted a list of Harry Potter fanfic summaries.
well, here is the la-*test*-('") batch.What's with the many, many vampire Harry Potter stories? I didn't see those two having a lot of overlap.
| QUOTE |
| Hermione is the beast student and one of the prettiest girls in school. She has a little problem... Story is better than it sounds. |
Oh, I just bet it is.
| QUOTE |
| this is a story about the reality in my head, id like to point out for the benifit of some people that im tyoing this in a moving car or during class, im not trying or applying myself sorry to dissapoint you |
Well, at least she warns you up front.
| QUOTE |
Harry thinks about Christmas Mpreg
|
Sometimes, it's the short summaries that get you. I don't know why, but this one makes me chuckle.
Still, for me, the truly terrifying thing is that this is the 41st volume of these summaries. I've tried to read some of the other ones, but I just can't. I either start losing faith in humanity or end up laughing out loud at inappropriate times at work.